Kids in Weddings

There’s definitely no right or wrong when it comes to kids in weddings. That includes the idea that you don’t have to have kids in your wedding or even at your wedding. That’s totally a valid choice. Adults only weddings are fun in their own unique way. And they come with their own challenges, just like any wedding.

We’ve already covered how to incorporate animals at weddings, and we’re not just talkin’ dogs in that article!

We almost included kids in that animal piece, but we quickly realized they are a whole puzzle unto themselves.

We have lots of ideas about kids in weddings, and we’ll also be writing about some ways to create ritual around blending families that could be used during the wedding or as an independent mini-event outside the wedding.

For any age

• one simple way to include everyone, regardless of age, is to have all their names on the wedding invitations;
• before the wedding, you could have them help with some DIY decorations and invite them to the cake tasting;
• another simple thing to do is to have family photos all over the wedding and party venue;
• you could each say vows to the children before going into the part of the wedding that is about the two of you;
• you could have a family blessing;
• and you could introduce the new couple not as Mr. and Mrs. but as the (insert name) family;
• if you have a shared family passion (whether that’s a sport or a Disney character), you could include this in decor or even on mens’ and boys’ socks;
• and finally, consider creating a family table for the kids right near the main table and decorate it special to distinguish it.

Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers in Weddings

• a traditional way to include these little ones is to have them be ring bearers or flower girls;
• but if they are even too young for that, you could have someone pull them in a decorated wagon down the aisle as part of the wedding party entrance;
• they could walk you down the aisle;
• they could be held or be standing with you when you’re saying your vows;
• you could mention them in your vows;
• they could hold cute signs;
• specifically they could walk down the aisle before the bride with signs that say “here comes my mommy.”

Make sure to have plenty of snacks for your young ones and provide areas for napping (but you probably already know that!).

Kids to Teens in Weddings

• have them work! ((ha)) they could hand out programs or walk people to their seats;
• have them do a reading during the ceremony (make it short and give them lots of time to practice);
• if anyone sings or plays an instrument, this is a fun way to incorporate them;
• no matter their ages, having them walk with you down the aisle will be special and quite emotional for everyone;
• and again, no matter their ages, from toddler on up, you could do first look photos with either the bride or groom or both;
• you could have them as junior bridesmaids and junior groomsmen;
• they could have special jobs to do, like seating the grandparents right before the big walks start;
• if you have an older child who loves being and is comfortable in front of crowds, you could even have them as the celebrant or as an assistant sort of celebrant, doing parts, if not the whole, of the ceremony.

Rituals to blend families

• during the wedding itself, you could have a unity candle ceremony that includes all the members of this newly made family;
• you could have figures on the wedding cake that represent the children;
• after the first dance for the couple, you could have a first dance for the newly blended family (like this one);
• you could have a sand pouring ceremony, a hand fasting, or a broom jump with the family during the wedding ceremony (to see examples of each of these, go here);
• before or after the actual wedding on a different day, you could have a special blending ceremony. This could be anything from a picnic at a favorite spot to a special dinner at home where you each make some promises to each other about the kind of family you will build together.

The main thing is that weddings are for the participants. So make it exactly what you want and need. There are no rules but to be happy and have a wonderful time!

Are you going to include children in your wedding? We would love to hear about it! We’d also love to hear if you’re planning to do anything we’ve written about here!